So Wrong Yet so Right
by Born to Survive
Summary: Kurt Hummel is not a quitter. Kurt Hummel always did the right thing, no matter how much it hurt. Blaine Anderson was the exception to every single one of those rules. Longer summary inside.


**AN—I've actually had this in the works since this summer…and wow I just got around to finish the first chapter. Well, the prologue. It might be slightly long, but, hey this just means the actual chapters might be longer! I don't know if that's a good or bad thing...**

**Rating: PG-13 for now, though it might be changed. We'll see if I'm up for writing any sexy scenes later (;**

**Summary: Kurt Hummel is not a quitter. Kurt Hummel always did the right thing, no matter how much it hurt. Blaine Anderson was the exception to every single one of those rules. **

**They broke up the summer before their freshman year in college, and the second he did it, Kurt knew it was the biggest mistake he'd made in his life. But it was the right thing to do, and he forced himself to let it go. 5 years later, at party of a friend, he spots a familiar head of curly hair. From then on, his whole life turns upside-down, and does the thing he swore so many years ago he'd never do again. Let Blaine Anderson back in to his life. **

**Slightly AU in the sense that Blaine is not a goddamn Junior and Kurt never transferred to Mckinley, therefore neither did Blaine. Not sure why it's that way, but let's just go with it. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or Kurt or Blaine or whatever other characters from the show come up. **

**Word Count: 2,591**

Kurt Hummel is not a quitter. Whenever he faces a challenge, he tries his hardest to conquer it and does a damn good job at it, too. Kurt Hummel always did the right thing, no matter how much it hurt. Kurt Hummel always guarded his heart, fearing that letting someone in would cause them to disappear from his life, and leaving him helpless and heartbroken. Because of this, Kurt Hummel never let anyone in. Kurt Hummel also thought he was never going to fall in love and have a relationship like the ones his Glee Club friends seem to constantly weave in and out of, and Kurt Hummel thought that _if_ he ever dated anyone, they'd be taller at him, or at least his size.

Blaine Anderson was the exception to every single one of Kurt's rules.

It's not like Kurt quit on Blaine because he thought the long-distance relationship thing was too big of a challenge, and he couldn't put up with it emotionally. Well, it's not the only reason he did it, at least. He did it out of common sense. He did it because he knew that jealousy and fights would ensue eventually—no that they already didn't happen, Kurt was a very stubborn person—and phone fights were never the wisest. Because after you have a fight over the phone with someone that lives across the country, you tend to not talk for a long time. Then you meet someone better, then you _break up_ over the phone and end up resenting them for the rest of your life.

Kurt couldn't imagine resenting and shutting Blaine out for the rest of his life.

So when he found out that Blaine had gotten into UCLA and him into NYU and they were both planning on going to said universities… well he did what was right. He did what was logical, and he saved both of them a whole lot of heartbreak and hatred and so much _mess. _

Or so he thought.

He broke up with Blaine two weeks after they graduated. The night was dark and the trees hid them from the party that was going on behind them. Maybe it wasn't the best idea to do it at a crowded party with all their friends attending, but the _guilt _was eating him away because since the last week of school, when they had both received their acceptance letters, he knew what he had to do while Blaine was still oblivious and happy as ever since they had finished the hell-hole some called high school.

They both cried. Kurt while he was explaining to Blaine why he was doing what he was doing, and Blaine as he looked on, both understanding and raw _sadness_ in his eyes. Because Blaine wasn't dumb. He saw the fear that flashed in Kurt's eyes as they opened their letters, and to be honest, although he won't admit this to anyone, the same thought went through his head. The one that said they probably wouldn't be able to make it while living across the country from each other.

They agreed to not spoil the evening for anyone else and not tell their friends about the break up until the next morning. They also agreed that nothing would change between them, because they were best friends first and boyfriends second, and they would keep in touch both during the rest of the summer and when they went away to college.

That didn't happen.

Kurt went straight to Mercedes and told her what had happened, "it was me, all me, I did it, I broke us up. He begged me not to, 'Cedes, _begged _me," crying all the while and surprised, because who knew that it would _hurt _so bad to do this, to let him go. His heart wrenched and he felt he was going to die and all he wanted to do was go back and tell Blaine that he didn't mean it, that he would fight for them, that he just wanted for them to hold each other like they always did when they were upset but he _knew _he couldn't. It wasn't the right thing to do.

Kurt Hummel thought he could forget about Blaine Anderson.

Blaine went and told Wes and David, "I—Kurt—he—doesn't want me—he—college—gone," barely being able to find a way to breathe properly, let alone form coherent sentences. He wasn't naïve enough to think that he and Kurt would be together forever, marry after college, have hundreds of gay babies and die old and senile sitting on their front porch holding hands and watching the sun set. But somehow this felt wrong, all wrong because so far they had been through so much together and he expected them to go through so much more, to face whatever college threw their way including the long-distance thing. Somehow, the image of them growing old together had made its way to his heart. And knowing that it would never happen now just felt like his whole world was ending. And it was true. Because somewhere along the way, along the coffee dates, the late-night studying in the commons, the sneaking kisses in-between classes, the just _being_ with each other, Kurt Hummel had become his whole world.

Blaine Anderson hoped he would get over Kurt Hummel.

They didn't talk at all for the rest of the summer. Kurt spent it all with Mercedes and Rachel, sleeping over at each other's houses, watching movies and eating unhealthy amounts of ice cream. It seemed as if he were trying to mend a broken heart .Kurt refused to believe so, though. Blaine spent his alongside Wes and David, and occasionally the other Warblers. After not wanting to talk to anyone a week after the break up, he realized that being with other people made it better, made his heart hurt less, made that terrible _empty_ feeling fade away just a bit. There were times when Kurt was left alone in his room, when Finn was in the living room playing video games with Puck, when Mercedes was at something with her church, when Rachel was doing something with her dads, when everyone just seemed to be doing something that didn't include him, and he just sat on his bed and cried. For hours on end, he cried for what he lost, for what he missed, for being so _stupid, _but mostly for knowing that what he did was for the best.

Kurt Hummel was still in love with Blaine Anderson.

There were times when Blaine was alone too. But in his case, he wanted to be alone. Because he thought that by crying, by letting it all out at once, he'd find himself over the tall, fair-skinned, blue-but-not-quite eyed beauty of a boy that left him. He thought that eventually he'd stop being so damn understanding at Kurt, and hate him for leaving him, like most heartbroken teens did nowadays. But he couldn't. He couldn't bear hating him.

Blaine Anderson was still in love with Kurt Hummel.

They didn't talk throughout their freshman year. There were times when Kurt saw something funny, something that reminded him of Blaine, and he'd whip out his phone to text him, until he realized that he couldn't because Blaine probably hated him, because Blaine probably wouldn't want to talk to him ever again, because Blaine wasn't _his_. Then he'd stop himself, and put his phone away, and that feeling of guilt and sadness and pain mixed all together would wash over him, and all he wanted to do at that moment was cry but he couldn't, because class was starting in 5 minutes so he would just have to save this for another day. That year, Kurt didn't allow himself to shed a tear over Blaine. Because he knew it wasn't Blaine he had to blame. It was himself.

Kurt Hummel broke his own heart.

Blaine met a boy on his first day of classes. He'd gotten confused on campus and by the time he found the right building, he was sure he would miss his first class, and _wow, _what screams freshman more than wandering around aimlessly? But then he showed up, all smiles and charm, tall and a little muscular—Blaine could tell—asking if he was lost and, hey, they're in the same class, do you want to walk there together? They talked on the way to the classroom, and Blaine sat next to the boy who he later came to know as Sean that day. He sat next to Sean every day from then on, in fact. Sitting together in class turned to sitting together in the coffee place near Blaine's dorm for hours –talking, reading, studying, and just enjoying each other's company—to sitting together on Sean's couch talking about nothing and everything, with Disney movie after Disney movie playing on his TV forgotten. Blaine tried not to compare Sean to Kurt for the longest time, and after a while, he did stop. Because being with Sean made him feel something that he hadn't felt for almost a year. He felt happy.

Blaine Anderson was starting to forget about Kurt Hummel.

Kurt dated a guy named Lucas the summer after his freshman year. Lucas was sweet, he was cute, and if we're being honest here, maybe not so great in the sack, but he made Kurt happy. To be exact, he almost made Kurt forget about Blaine most of the time. Almost. Lucas didn't last long, though. In fact, all the other boyfriends after that and during his sophomore year didn't last very long either. The thing was that they were all perfectly good guys, so why couldn't he just give some of them _a chance_? Well the thing was that Dave had a thing where he left his socks on during sex, and Nick always left hickies on his neck (and _hell_ there were only so many outfits he could pair up with scarves) while Will chewed with his mouth open, splattering food everywhere, and Cameron once asked him who Alexander McQueen was, "and was he the King of England or something?" so… naturally Kurt had to break up with all of them. He couldn't waste his time with people like that. After a while he gave up on relationships (because there was only so many times a guy could say "It's not you, it's me" every one or two months for a year and not mean it without it messing with his sanity) and decided that hooking up with random guys was better, because if you really think about it, all Kurt wanted was the sex, so hey, picking up a random, okay-looking guy, at the bar and fucking him quickly in the men's room—or sometimes in his dorm if he liked him enough (or was drunk enough)—didn't really sound like a bad idea. So weeknights were spent alone—and occasionally with Mercedes or Rachel—watching whatever weird TLC show was on that afternoon along with chinese takeout, his good friend Jose Cuervo, and his homework. After a while his friends started worrying. Kurt waved them off, telling them he was fine.

Kurt Hummel was miserable, but he wouldn't dare show it.

Blaine and Sean started dating officially on December 5th, 2013, thanks to some mistletoe and a little bit of eggnog. Blaine was happy. He didn't think about Kurt all that much anymore. When looking at Warbler pictures, or when he showed Sean their performances on youtube, he didn't feel that sharp stab of pain he did before. But then one day Sean realized they hadn't watched a video titled Candles and suddenly for some reason, Blaine realized he didn't want Sean to know anything about Kurt, because that meant he'd have to explain everything to him, everything down to that one summer night. And then sitting through it seemed like the only option if he didn't want to raise any questions. But then he saw that face, and heard his voice and it was like he was back at his Dalton dorm room, just him and that beautiful boy beside him on his bed late at night, just them and the whispered promises of forever they thought they would never break.

Blaine didn't talk to anyone but Wes for weeks after that, only because they were roommates and it was kind of unavoidable. Sean was worried, of course he was, Blaine was his _boyfriend _and he wasn't talking to him. Wes said that he had to tell Sean about Kurt, otherwise Sean would jump to conclusions, and honesty is the best policy in a relationship, to which Blaine promptly kicked Wes out of their dorm, telling him to stay with one of his friends, because _how can he suggest that_. Blaine wasn't ready to talk about Kurt, even though it didn't hurt as much when he did anymore but only to Wes, and possibly David whenever he called or visited from Boston, and that was a privilege so really Wes was just being ungrateful and he couldn't put up with that right now. Nonetheless, he had to face the truth and he and Sean started talking again weeks later. Yet, always the courageous one, Blaine told Sean he didn't want to talk about it. Sean understood, and that made Blaine angry. Kurt wouldn't have understood. Kurt would've put up a fight until Blaine told him and then he would've sat him down and talked about it. They would've worked through it together. They always did.

Blaine Anderson was miserable, but he would never dare show it.

They both graduated in 2016. Kurt with a BA in fashion and design and Blaine with one in music theory, from their respective schools. By now one was only but a fading memory to the other, the pain in their hearts that was once so present, unbearable even, was now a dull ache, something that came up whenever they were left alone with their thoughts. In Kurt's case, he didn't have time, not with his intern job at one of New York's most sought-after interior design offices and quickly making his way into making this a permanent, well-paying job. He didn't have time for distractions like a childish old flame that probably doesn't even think about him, probably doesn't remember his name anymore. He also tried to convince himself that he didn't have time for any new flames either, and he was better of this way: alone but never lonely; he repeated this to himself so often he almost managed to completely believe it. Almost.

Blaine's excuse was that he had Sean and it wasn't fair if his heart—even if it speck of it, a minuscule part of it—didn't one hundred percent belong to him. So slowly, he lets it go, lets Kurt Hummel fade from his mind. Very, very slowly.

They didn't need each other anymore, they weren't so unhealthily reliant to each other as they once had been, they didn't feel like they were being torn apart when they weren't with one another, and they believed they would never feel that way about each other. Not now, not ever.

That is, until their eyes lock from across the room in a crowded room full of New York socialites. Because the electricity that courses through their bodies when hazel meets an unmistakably vibrant blue is undeniable and with just one look, one meet of the eyes, they know they're in too deep already.

**AN- So here's the prologue! I'll try to have the first chapter up later this week, we'll see! I'm really excited about this, and hopefully updates won't be painfully apart time-wise since most of the story is outlined. I just need to write a lot of in-between.**

**Also, this is unbeta'd so i apologize for mistakes, and if anyone would like to volunteer please message me! **

**xo**


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